I love reading something that resonates and recently I read an article in Forbes that ZINGED me. I just wanted to share it with you in the hopes that you can be the change in your own life to really make a difference in where you are going:
The 8 self-limiting,
negative behaviors successful people avoid are:
Engaging in “below
the line” thinking
“Below the line”
thinking refers to a particular mindset that shapes how you view the world in a
limiting way. It leads to your believing that what’s happening to you is
outside your control and everyone else’s fault – the economy, your industry,
your boss, your spouse, etc. Below the line thinking says, “It’s not fair
what’s happening, and I don’t have what it takes to overcome these challenges.
I didn’t expect this and I can’t handle it.” Above the line thinking, on
the other hand, says, “I clearly see the obstacles ahead, and I’m addressing
them with open eyes. I’m accountable for my life and my career, and I
have what it takes to navigate through this successfully. If I fail, I’ll
still wake up tomorrow exactly who I am, and will have learned something
critical.”
Mistaking fantastical
wishful thinking for action
Successful
professionals pursue outcomes that flow organically from their current actions.
Unsuccessful individuals attach to fantasies that may relieve them momentarily
of their situational pain but have no basis in reality. For instance,
I’ve heard from corporate professionals who share, “Kathy, I really hate my job
and desperately want to leave. I’ve been wanting to write a book and
become a motivational speaker for several years now. What’s your
advice?” I’ll respond, “OK, great. Are you writing and speaking?”
and more often than not, the answer will be, “Uh…no.” You can’t write a
book if you’re not writing anything, and you can’t speak in public if you
haven’t developed any material to speak about. It’s critical to
take bold action toward your visions, in order to create
success. Successful people develop huge goals too, but they crush them
down into smaller, digestible (but courageous) action steps that they then
build on, which leads naturally to the end goal they’re pursuing.
Remaining powerless
and speechless
Successful people are in touch with their power, and are not
afraid to use it and express it. They advocate and negotiate strongly for
themselves and for others, and for what they care about, and don’t shy away
from articulating just how they stand apart from the competition. They
know how they contribute uniquely and the value they bring to the
table. In addition, they don’t wait to bring up concerns – they
tackle challenges head on, speaking about them openly,
with calm, poise and grace. They don’t hide from their problems.
And they don’t perceive themselves as hapless victims.
Putting off investing
in themselves
I see this behavior over and over in those who feel thwarted
and unsuccessful – they are incredibly reluctant to invest time, money and
energy in themselves and their own growth. They are comfortable only when
putting other people’s needs ahead of their own. They’ll make any excuse
for why now is NOT the time to invest in themselves or commit to change.
They feel guilt, shame and anxiety over claiming “I’m worth this.”
Successful people don’t wait – they spend money, time and effort on their own
growth because they know without doubt it will pay off – for themselves and
everyone around them.
Resisting change
Successful people don’t break themselves against what is or
drown in the changing tides. They go with the flow. They follow the
trends, and embrace them. They are flexible, fluid and nimble. They
react to what’s in front of them, and improvise deftly. Those who
are unsuccessful bemoan what is appearing before them, and stay stuck in the
past or in what they “expected,” complaining about how life is not what it
should be and why what is feels so wrong.
Honoring other
people’s priorities over their own
Successful people know what matters most to them – their
priorities, values, concerns, and their mission and purpose. They don’t
float aimlessly on a sea of possibility – they are masters of their own ship
and know where they want to head, and make bold moves in the direction of their
dreams. To do this, they are very clear about their top priorities in
life and work, and won’t be waylaid by the priorities and values of
others. In short, they have very well-defined boundaries, and know where
they end and others begin. They say “no” to endeavors and behaviors (and
thinking) that will push them off track. They know what they want to
create and the legacy they want to leave behind in this lifetime, and honor
that each day.
Doubting themselves
and their instincts
Those who doubt themselves, lack trust in their own gut or
instincts, or second-guess themselves continually find themselves far from
where they want to be. Successful professionals believe in themselves
without fail. Sure, they acknowledge they have “power gaps” or blind
spots, and areas that need deep development. But they forgive themselves
for what they don’t know and the mistakes they’ve made, and accept
themselves. They keep going with hope and optimism, knowing that the
lessons from these missteps will serve them well in the future.
Searching for
handouts and easy answers
I can often tell from the first contact I have with someone
if they’ll be likely to succeed in their new entrepreneurial venture and
career, or not. How? By the nature of their expectations, and how
they set out to fulfill them. Here’s an example – if a complete
stranger reaches out to me expecting free help without considering what she may
offer in return, it’s a bad sign. Let’s say she asks something like this:
“I’m launching my new business and wondered if you can give me some advice. I
can’t pay you because I’m a startup, but I hope you can help me anyway.”
From this one email, I know she’s not ready to make it
happen in her own business. Why? Because successful professionals (and
those destined to be) wouldn’t consider asking for help in this way.
Instead, they: 1) understand that they have something important and valuable to
offer in any situation, 2) are willing and happy to share or barter that in
return for what they want, and 3) they treat others exactly as they would like
to be treated.
Successful professionals are respectful, resourceful,
curious, competent, tenacious, and they figure out how to get the help they
need without asking for handouts. That doesn’t mean they don’t seek
assistance when and where they need it , or make use of the many free resources
available to them (like Score.org, etc.). It means that they
don’t expect something for nothing. They treat others equitably and
fairly and know they deserve the same. Successful professionals realize
that if they’re not willing to pay for products and services they want, then
others won’t be willing to pay them (yes, it works like karma).
They also know that their success is directly proportionate
to the effort they put in. Most of all, they
understand there are no short cuts or easy answers on the road to success.
No comments:
Post a Comment